In June 2020, I received confirmation that I could come to France as a language assistant. While most people were contemplating, whether to go or not, due to the COVID situation, my Dad told me “Of course you are going. Better there, than here.” And he was so excited for me. My parents moved in with me two months before my departure and I loved having them there. My dad never understood my love for the Harry Potter books and I made him read the first one and he found it very interesting and asked to read the second one. We then discussed quidditch and spells and it was so amazing seeing my dad utter those unfamiliar words. We went on evening walks together. He watched me workout and get stronger and he was so proud of me. I was always overweight and he worried about me. He was in perfect health. We teased mummy together(a little bit). He admired my paintings. He watered my plants. Killed a succulent(I feel bad for whining about it).
I have been in France since September 27th 2020. I was looking forward to living with my parents. I even had plans to bring them here so they could travel a little bit.
My dad died on 2nd May 2021. I couldn’t even be at his funeral.
So, coming back to why I am writing this. Several people sent me texts to offer condolences. I’d like to thank them. However, I would like to point out a few things you don’t want to tell someone who has lost a parent to COVID. Especially since the situation is so grave in India and in many parts of the world.
- Do not tell them you understand exactly how it feels, unless you have lost a parent or guardian or sibling in the past.
- Do not tell them you know exactly how they feel because x number of your dads colleagues passed away or your neighbour’s uncle passed away due to COVID.
- Do not tell them that its nature’s way of eliminating a few millions.
Just tell them that you are sorry for their loss. Ask them if there is anything you can do for them. Ask them if you could call them sometime. Just provide a shoulder to cry on. Say you will pray for their Dad’s soul. If you knew the person who died, tell something nice that person did for you or recount a conversation you had with that person. It helps. It’s so simple.
That said, I am so glad for each and every one of you who reached out to me.
I remember something daddy told me very recently.
I am above 65y/o, I have a roof over my head, clothes to wear, food to eat, a family and good health. I have already lived a wonderful life. I am lucky.